Chocolate Sprinkles
by Gmariam
Summary: Tosh and Owen question Ianto about Jack's flirting and challenge him to do something about it.


Chocolate Sprinkles

"Does it ever bother you?" asked Tosh, keeping her voice down just in case the subject of her query walked in.

Ianto glanced up from his lunch, the questioning look on his face prompting her to continue even as Owen sniggered beside her.

"The looks, the smiles, the flirting?" She was slightly embarrassed to even be asking, but Owen had brought it up earlier that day after watching another round of it at the coffee machine, and she had to admit, she was curious as well.

Setting down his fork, Ianto smiled and nodded. "Ah, this morning. Should it bother me?" He took a sip of his water bottle as he waited for her reply.

"You tell us," said Owen, jumping into the conversation that was his idea in the first place; Tosh just hoped he didn't stick his foot in it. "He can be almost unrelenting sometimes. How do you stand it?"

They received a shrug in reply as Ianto returned to his lunch. "It's just Jack. That's the way he is." He paused and looked up. "Why, does it bother you?"

"Does what bother me?" asked Owen, and Ianto rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"Does it bother you when he does that stuff?"

"With you?"

A short laugh accompanied raised eyebrows and careful enunciation. "No, with you. Does it bother you when Jack flirts with _you_?"

Owen snorted as he tipped back in his chair. "For someone who claims to know so much, you sure missed the boat on that one. Jack doesn't flirt with me."

"Can't imagine why," Tosh murmured under her voice. Ianto ducked his head and chuckled as Owen threw her an annoyed look.

"Seriously," said Owen, leaning forward again. "He used to, until I punched him. You were there, Tosh. It was that night at the Dockside with Suzie a few years ago—he about drove me up the wall with it. One fat lip later, and I'm flirt free."

"Do you miss it then?" asked Ianto, sharing an amused smile with Tosh. Owen actually groaned, missing the exchange completely.

"Gods, no. Best set of bruised knuckles in my life, and I got a day off for it, too. So answer the question: does it bother _you_?"

Ianto leaned forward and very patiently looked them both in the eye. "No, it doesn't. It's just who he is and what he does."

"So if he stopped, you wouldn't miss it?" asked Owen.

"Do you?" countered Ianto.

"Not a bit," said the doctor. "But you return it. Would you miss flirting back with him if he stopped?"

Ianto didn't even hesitate as he shook his head. "Nope, because there's always you and Tosh." Owen sputtered, but Tosh laughed; Ianto was clearly taking the piss. "I might be concerned for Jack's well being, though," he continued thoughtfully.

"His well being?" asked Tosh. She chanced a glance at the door to make sure Jack didn't walk in on their conversation.

"Wouldn't you find it odd if Jack suddenly stopped acting like Jack?" asked Ianto, as if it were obvious. "No wild stories, no shameless innuendo?"

"Well, of course I would," said Tosh. "I'd probably run a scan for alien tech and send him to Owen for blood work." She shared a laugh with Ianto before continuing. "But Jack being Jack doesn't mean he needs to harass you so much."

Ianto's eyes widened, and he offered a very inelegant noise that sounded like a cross between a snort and a laugh. "He's not harassing me, Tosh, no matter what I might say about filling out the forms. Like Owen said, I do try to hold my own, and that's just part of it."

Tosh crossed her hands in front of her and studied Ianto, trying to decide whether or not she could get away with asking more. She had little choice when Owen snapped his fingers in front of her, bringing her back to the conversation.

"Out with it, Tosh. What are you thinking?"

"Loads of things, most of them wildly inappropriate," said Tosh, shaking herself with a laugh and earning a snort from Owen. "But here's another question for you, Ianto. What if he meant it?"

Ianto paused with his fork halfway to his mouth. "Meant what?"

"The flirting, the teasing—you know, the hints and suggestions? All of it. What if he meant what he says?"

Owen rolled his eyes. "Good lord, Tosh, he's Jack Harkness, he never means anything."

"I don't think that's true," said Tosh, turning toward Owen. "I think he means quite a bit of what he says to people. He just says it in a way to make them _think_ he doesn't mean it."

Ianto was frowning now. "I'm not sure that applies to workplace banter around the coffee machine, Tosh."

"But what if it did?" she pressed. "What would you do then?"

Ianto was staring at her as if the thought had never occurred to him. "I don't know. Maybe pull an Owen Harper and punch him," he replied dryly.

"You've already done that," Owen pointed out. "He just waited a bit and started up with it again." Both Tosh and Ianto threw him dirty looks at the reminder of a very dark and still relatively recent time for them all.

"Maybe instead of solving things with violence, boys," Tosh said, a hint of exasperation in her voice, "you should try something else."

"I don't understand why it's an issue," said Ianto, sounding casual yet slightly puzzled. "It means nothing. It's how Jack works, how he communicates—it's just who he is."

"So sure of that, are you?" asked Owen, and Ianto gave him a bland look.

"I'm fairly good at reading people, yes."

"Really? And you can read Jack Harkness?"

"I didn't say that," Ianto said, returning to his food with an enigmatic look. "But I did get myself a job here, and I do know exactly what needs to be done around this place every day to keep it running smoothly." He raised his eyes to Owen's face with an eyebrow cocked in challenge. "And you're certainly an open book."

"Sod off," Owen snapped. "I don't need you psychoanalyzing me when I'm the doctor around here."

"Wouldn't dream of it," murmured Ianto. "Not my type of reading, your book."

"Besides, if it's psychoanalysis we're doing, it should be yours," Owen said, completely ignoring Ianto's dry comment about reading. "You still haven't answered the question."

"Which was?"

"What if he meant it?" said Tosh, jumping back in because it struck her that Ianto was a master at deflecting the issue at hand; he had just done so by perfectly distracting and then winding up Owen.

"Tosh," Ianto said patiently. "He doesn't mean anything by it, really."

"How do you know?" asked Owen. "Why else did he hire you? He's been practically eye f—"

"Owen," Tosh warned, knowing what Owen was going to say and sensing it was definitely taking things too far for the conversation. She gave Ianto an apologetic smile.

Ianto shrugged at Owen's question, though Tosh wasn't sure what the man made of the doctor's unsaid words. "He hired me because I asked him too, that's why. And I kept asking until I caught him a dinosaur, and then he couldn't say no."

"Now that's some serious flirting," Owen muttered, and Tosh couldn't help but giggle. Ianto cleared his throat almost as if he was embarrassed.

"Yes, well, it worked, didn't it? And now you lot can't live with out my coffee."

"And you like flirting back with Jack Harkness." Owen and Ianto stared at one another across the table until Ianto sighed.

"What do you want me to do? Do you want me to punch him so he'll stop?"

"I just want you to answer the question. What if he meant it? What would you do?"

Ianto shook his head in confusion. "Are you asking if I would take him up on it?"

"Yes. That."

"He doesn't mean it, so there's nothing to take him up on."

Owen rolled his eyes. "He's Jack Harkness, he's always ready to be taken up. Or down. Or any other way."

"I did not need that mental image," Ianto said, shaking his head. But he was glancing down at his food with the barest hint of upturned lips, and shook his head again, as if to reiterate his statement and clear his head.

"You could try to find out," said Tosh, exchanging a sideways grin with Owen. "See if he means it."

Ianto's head snapped up, and he gaped at them, a rare sight when he was always so calm and in control of the conversation. Nothing ever surprised him, but Tosh just had pulled it off rather well. "And how would I go about that?"

"Start it," said Owen, grinning broadly. "Be the first one to flirt, and see what kind of reaction you get. If he seems surprised, you're probably safe."

Ianto really did let loose a snort that time. "Safe? You mean, safe from the roaming eyes and wandering hands of the insatiable Jack Harkness?"

"Exactly," said Tosh, nodding. "I think Owen might be onto something. And if Jack returns your flirting, then maybe he's a bit more serious about it."

"And that's when you punch him," added Owen.

Ianto pushed his plate away and leaned back in his chair, arms folded across his chest. "Let me get this straight: you're suggesting I seduce our boss so we know whether or not he's a genuine flirt or just an insincere tease?"

Owen almost spit out the drink he had been about to finish. "Bloody hell, Ianto, we didn't say seduce! Just flirt on the initiative, and see if he goes on the defensive."

"Why would I do that again?" asked Ianto.

"It'd be fun to watch," shrugged Owen, earning a very skeptical look of raised eyebrows in reply. "And I have to admit I'd like to watch someone mess with Jack Harkness a bit, see if you can't crack him with your verbal repartee." If anything, Ianto's eyebrows moved even higher.

"And I'm just curious now," added Tosh. "I'd like to see Jack's reaction if you dial it up, since he's always the one doing the flirting." Ianto offered her a small smile.

"Well, I'd do anything for you, Tosh," he said, winking at her. Owen waved his arm across the table at him.

"That's what I'm talking about! Try that on Jack and see what happens. He'll either snog you senseless or never flirt with you again."

"Think you can do it?" challenged Tosh.

"I think it's immature and unprofessional," said Ianto, shaking his head, but there was definitely a spark of interest in his eyes. At that very moment, Jack walked into the room, Gwen right behind him, a huge grin on his face.

"What's immature and unprofessional? Because I can always go for more immature and unprofessional around here."

Owen exchanged a look with Tosh, who tossed it across the table to Ianto, who simply rolled his eyes in that way he had that said more than words ever could.

"Nothing, sir. Just the usual."

"And does that come with chocolate sprinkles?" Jack winked at Ianto. Tosh could barely hold back a giggle, and Owen actually groaned out loud. Ianto looked slightly surprised before a slow smile spread across his face.

"I'm sure I can find some somewhere, sir," he replied. "Chocolate is good for serotonin levels, after all…amongst other things." Jack's eyes widened slightly before he grinned again, though it was clear Ianto's reply had thrown him.

"I look forward to it," Jack finally returned. Tosh stared at him, then at Ianto, who simply nodded at Jack, as if following orders and not flirting outrageously right in front of them all.

"Bloody hell," Owen muttered under his breath. "Told you so."

Ianto just smiled serenely at them both.

* * *

There were chocolate sprinkles in his coffee the next morning, and Jack wondered what he had done to earn them aside from the casual remark at lunch the day before. Ianto usually returned his subtle (and more overt) flirting with a witty retort…but he'd never actually followed through with one of them. These were actual sprinkles, slowly melting into the dark liquid and lending Jack's coffee a delicious combination of flavor that burst upon his tongue with each slow sip.

And Jack wasn't sure whether that was a good thing or a bad thing coming from Ianto Jones.

* * *

Author's Note:  
Just a short scene that could go further, but probably won't. I'm working on a longer chaptered fic, and sometimes it's good to step back and try something lighter as a break. Hope you enjoyed it. I found it amusing to think that Tosh and Owen might actually challenge Ianto to flirt back with Jack, and that maybe that's how it started. I imagine a bit more of this type of thing leading up to TKKS and the stopwatch comment, so feel free to imagine it in your mind.


End file.
